Being very upset and continuing to feel like crap.

I didn't plan this but I do agree with Will on a lot of things (Will is my friend from SLT and probably the one person who made the biggest impact on me while I was there. He's disagree with that, but it's what i think. Ok, so Christ himself made the biggest impact, but Will was well used.)
First thing I noticed that I agree with was what Will said early on. He said what he really wanted more than anything was a mentor that he could talk to (if I remember correctly) who would just listen without trying to come up with a solution or whatever. Just two weeks ago I founf I had the exact same problem. I was sick and tired of trying to explain why I was getting so upset and depressed all semester and why I felt like quitting everything I was doing only to end up in some kind of counseling session. It's like noone knew how to just listen. Instead my friends and family members analyzed, reasoned a solution and told me the answer to what I was feeling. After a while I wanted to just shout (at one person in particular, mainly) that I wasn't asking for a solution. It would have been something like, "I'm not telling you that I don't know what to do and I want you to tell me what to do. I don't want counseling. I don't want advice. Don't think I can't solve this by myself. I just want to talk it out. For me, talking through my feelings is how I come up with action. Just listen. Shut up and listen." I also learned the importance of listening to other people as well. I don't know how well I'm doing but I am acutely aware of how dangerous it is to interupt. I can't stand being interrupted in the middle of trying to make an important point. Maybe I should be more brief. maybe it's just a humbling thing. Maybe I shouldn't speak at all sometimes.
Well the other thing I agree with Will on is the loss of the desire to lead. He said that he didn't lie being tole he was a leader anymore because of what leadership entailed. I'm starting to feel like there's no reason for me to lead anything any more. But it's a feeling of enormous conflict. I don't feel any calling anywhere. I feel nothing at all. I fell like there is no anwer to all my question prayers. I still want certain things to get done. I still get inspiration, and I lot of ideas, but does that qualify as a calling? If it does then I'm just the idea person. I get millions of ideas all day every day, but I'm afraid to say anything because the few times I have I've seen them die because there was no way for me to carry them out. It's not just "That's a good idea," it's "Now arrange for it to happen and work, all by yourself, and do everything all by yourself." But I don't have the arrangement in my calling, I just have ideas, so maybe that's not a calling at all. It's the reason I want to quit. There are a lot of things that make me want to quit. And it's much darker than that.